I'm seeing a therapist.  There's a bunch of things I want help with.  One thing I mentioned to him most recently is how I carry all this baggage about chasing girls when I was younger --- I almost wish I hadn't exerted so much effort.  It's such a crapshoot trying to pursue casual sex --- or just waiting for it to randomly happen.  I wish I could be positive and say there's more important things, that's not the measure of me as a man, I don't have to be that disappointed by the end results, but it's hard.  Honestly, looking back at my twenties, I was expecting a lot more than I got.

I mentioned how it only makes things worse that I really, really wanted to sleep with pregnant women and had no luck whatsoever.  I thought it's a huge world, there's gotta be pregnant ladies in my area looking to get their needs met (I lived in a huge city to boot!), but, boy, it's not that easy at all.  Or I just was too focused on my career: I worked so hard, I missed out on a lot of being young, partying, and all that.  (I spent a lot of time in libraries.  There were a few amazing pregnant librarians, but there was no way I was going to embarrass myself and everyone else trying to hit on them.)

My therapist's response: "Dude, it's a huge world, there's gotta be pregnant girls out there, they have needs, too.  Have you tried Tinder?"

He even suggested I ask my wife to consider opening up our marriage or something like that so I could "get back on the trail"...

When I told the therapist how Tinder doesn't let you search for pregnant women specifically so it's almost a complete waste of time, he suggested going to Reddit --- "There's a Reddit for everything."

So I thought to myself: OK, let's go to Preggophilia and see what people think.

Am I wrong?  How can we set realistic expectations when it comes to pursuing pregnant women in real life so guys don't end up depressed like me?  I have seen some guys say "It's not that hard..." on here over the years, but lately it seems like people are less gung ho.

Would anyone take this guy's advice?  I just think I should be focused on moving forward.  I have a job I love, where I am successful, that takes a huge chunk of my time --- but at least I feel like my effort and time are rewarded and the world wants what I have to offer, unlike chasing girls just for sex.  Plus, I want to spend what little time I have left exploring the world with my wife.  Now I'm not sure what's worse: the fact that my wife refuses to let me pursue pregnant women or the fact that the therapist has gotten my hopes up.  (Actually, I do know which one is worse...  the second option, by a big margin.)

I feel like I had super, super unrealistic expectations when I was 18 --- about pregnant women, about sex --- and I'm paying for it now.

Thanks for reading.

It is that hard. Even if you did open up the marriage and start looking around... well, good luck. Dating apps/services are bad enough without throwing the pregnancy factor in. After years of trying to be smart about it, in the end, it all came down to my sharing my kinks with a woman I was going to date and her connecting me with a sex worker. I ended up ditching the woman (we were a terrible match) and getting together with the sex worker long-term. We're an actual couple now. She's vacuuming in the other room as I type this. Life's weird, and that was all pure luck after years of similar desperation.

If your wife refuses to let you pursue pregnant women, none of the rest of these things even matters. You need to get that sorted one way or the other. Figure that out first.

Mate you are doing better than most people in this community. You have a wife. Have you considered asking her if she would be willing to pregnant role play with you? There are decent and affordable fake bellies on ebay. Obviously you don’t want to actually get her pregnant.

As preggophiles a lot of us don’t want the responsibility of raising kids. We just want to have fun with pregnant women. I’m going to assume you fall into this category. Honestly getting lucky and finding a pregnant escort seems to be the most likely scenario that will satisfy your needs.

As for your wife, I think you need to have a talk with her. Let her know how important being able to experience a pregnant woman is to you. If she loves you she will understand and do what she can to help.

Good luck mate, I hope you can get what you are looking for.

"Suggesting you ask your wife for permission to cheat on her" was not on my therapy bingo card.

Since my teenage years I've wanted to spend just one hour with a pair of huge boobs in my face. I'm talking J-cup or bigger. My wife is not physically equipped to meet that need, nor is she the type to be cool with me indulging that desire with someone else. It's quite likely I'll be six feet under before I ever get the chance to experience that. You can either come to terms with something like that, or you can make yourself miserable thinking about what you're missing. Not everyone gets to live out their sexual fantasies.

My advice:
1. Put some serious distance between yourself and this fetish until you can cope with it better, or until you find an outlet for it that is healthy for you, your wife, and your relationship.
2. Consider getting a new therapist.

(August 29, 2022, 7:14 pm)doubleintegral "Suggesting you ask your wife for permission to cheat on her" was not on my therapy bingo card.

Since my teenage years I've wanted to spend just one hour with a pair of huge boobs in my face.  I'm talking J-cup or bigger.  My wife is not physically equipped to meet that need, nor is she the type to be cool with me indulging that desire with someone else.  It's quite likely I'll be six feet under before I ever get the chance to experience that.  You can either come to terms with something like that, or you can make yourself miserable thinking about what you're missing.  Not everyone gets to live out their sexual fantasies.

My advice:
1.  Put some serious distance between yourself and this fetish until you can cope with it better, or until you find an outlet for it that is healthy for you, your wife, and your relationship.
2.  Consider getting a new therapist.

Agreed

(August 29, 2022, 7:14 pm)doubleintegral "Suggesting you ask your wife for permission to cheat on her" was not on my therapy bingo card.

It's not cheating if permission's been given. Not even close. The therapist recommended that OP ask to open the relationship, which is something a lot of people do (though it usually doesn't work by that point, and just adds to the stigma). Non-monogamy is normal for millions of people, myself included - so be careful not to invalidate it.

HOWEVER... if OP has expressed that opening is not an option, but therapist keeps pressing the issue... that doesn't sound productive at all, and is only going to cause anguish. I'm not in those sessions so I don't know, but yeah um... look, I have a therapist too, and they've never tried to coax me into doing something that I've said is simply not within the realm of possibility. The wife's feelings matter too, and if she wants pure monogamy, then that's where she stands. OP can either take it or leave it.

(August 30, 2022, 8:52 am)Akhenaten It's not cheating if permission's been given. Not even close. The therapist recommended that OP ask to open the relationship, which is something a lot of people do (though it usually doesn't work by that point, and just adds to the stigma). Non-monogamy is normal for millions of people, myself included - so be careful not to invalidate it.

It was more of me oversimplifying for the sake of humor, but you're right. Point taken.

(August 29, 2022, 4:14 pm)BasedGd1768 My therapist's response: "Dude, it's a huge world, there's gotta be pregnant girls out there, they have needs, too.

Such as financial, emotional, or just support from a partner or SO since those woman are usually single and are already going through a rough time. You should really get a new therapist.


Also just like everything in life, pregnancy is temporary. In my case, I decided that I wouldn't want pregnant bellies in my face or mind 24/7 since that would eventually make my life boring. Does it make me less Gung ho? Yeah probably since I consider this fetish a crutch more than anything. I despise even being called a "Preggophile" due to the fact. Like yes I like pregnant women, but I'm not going to make it part of my personality. And it's gotten even more jarring over the years as I've seen family members and close friends that I care for become pregnant and having kids then login here where pregnant women are being treated like hunting trophies. I don't know if I'm getting older and developing a different perspective or I'm finally starting to break away from this fetish as my desire and lust isn't as potent as the majority of others here.

As others have already said, be grateful for what you have. Everyone expects a lot from their 20s, but there's more to life than satisfying your sexual desires. Also, why is your therapist giving you such reckless advice? With a therapist like that, you'd be better off taking advice from your barber.

Man… good for you for being at least open and honest about this. It seems like you have made a pretty good life for yourself so I would definitely recommend not risking losing that. Looking back all that partying and extra stuff isn’t going to be as important as the stability and relationships you have built by staying focused on yourself and your personal growth. Say you did one day get with a pregnant girl it would feel really good in the moment but would it be worth losing the person that was always down for you? Probably not and you would probably regret it. And think about it like this each women pregnant or not comes with all sorts of different emotional baggage, which makes even entertaining other women a potential headache that you probably don’t need! Also there is so much pregnant content out there rn via tictoc, onlyfans, and porn sites and I bet those women are way finer then a random you match with on tinder. I’d say just focus on yourself king!