So I have a girlfriend and im a 24 year old virgin. Shes great, but i dont really have too much of a desire to have sex right now. Well I do, but not as much as the average person, and shes been patient with me, but i can tell its hard for her to wait. I’m sexually attracted to her, but im afraid my fetish is making me not want anything that doesn’t have to do with my fetish. She knows I have this fetish and shes fine with it. I just wanna know if anyone else’s sex drive is low due to their fetish or am i just overthinking it, and im just quite not ready?
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You might want to think about seperating yourself from this fetish. When I start going out with a girl, I basically stop looking at porn altogether. Right now its like your going out with 2 people. One is your girlfriend and one is your fantasy and you just dont have time for both. Find someone you genuinely care for and are into and in time, if they are the right one, you will get to enjoy the ultimate fantasy. Banging a preggo with your kid.
But yeah tl:dr your sex drive is probably low due to finding release here. Save some for gf.
Like Tomo said, it time to put the fetish on ice for now. Perhaps give nofap a go for a short time until you are ready. I know that if I EVER (maybe one day haha) got a girlfriend I would have to put all of this aside.
Sounds like nerves. Zero issues here with my woman, but if I'm online looking for pics/vids then it's pregnant 100% because porn is just for getting off. When you're ready, if she's already waiting she will probably lead the way so just go with it. Don't worry about lasting long, don't be a battering ram, and try to pick up on her cues. If you like her, I guarantee you're in for a good time.
I completely disagree with the notion that somehow not looking at porn is going to make the fetish go away or hide. I enjoy both non-fetishy sex and looking at porn, of all varieties. Enjoy yourself. Engage in hedonism.
You're asking if your fetish is making it tough to have sex with your girlfriend. It's not a difficult question -- do you not want to have sex with her because she's not pregnant? Or are you anxious because you've never had penetrative sex? Have you done other sexy stuff with her? It helps to work up to things and to not overthink it... but that can be tough if you're, say, demisexual. | |||||||||
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