I have had a pregnancy fetish ever since puberty. It formed the core of my arousal supplemented by an enjoyment of young or young looking (post pubescent) girls with curves. I have discovered through therapy that this seems to be a symbolic expression of masculinity. To me the act of a girl getting pregnant and bring proud of it is the most affirming thing she can do for her partner.

When I met my wife and began a sexual relationship, I quickly divulged my fascination with pregnancy and the fact that she was young and well endowed seemed perfect. She participated in the fantasy role-play of being pregnant both in person and via email/IM. For the most part, I stopped masturbating by myself any time I had the chance to see or talk to her preferring to share that sexual experience with her. Keep in mind we were both very inexperienced sexually.

I moved in with her and our relationship went from 100% of the time we spent together to only a fraction of the time. Real life responsibilities and needs were now to be considered. As she realized that my life was not all-about-her, our sexual relationship diminished but only slightly. I masturbated, but not nearly as frequently as when I was single. She discovered at that point that I had a collection of sexual and pregnancy-themed emails from former girlfriends I had saved. She felt betrayed and I apologized and deleted most of them feeling I could simply keep the rest secret. A few more time in our relationship we had brief discussions about my occasional habits but before any objective understanding could occur, she would flip out, feel insulted and completely disengage from the conversation. No real solution was ever reached, just her insistence that I stop.

Fast forward to a year into our first home together. Our sex life is growing and I find myself not wanting to masturbate. We got married and were enjoying life. At some point, she simply tells me she no longer wants to play into my fantasy, she wants me to want her for who she is. We wanted to have children so I didn't see this as too much of a problem. Not long after, she announced she was pregnant. We were both happy but it seemed that her frustration with my fetish prohibited her from enjoying what was no longer a fantasy. Despite being a young pregnant woman, she didn't find it as sexy as I did. I feel she thought I was looking at her as an object instead of the wife who was carrying my child. The thought of being objectified to her (despite having a great body) seemed not worth knowing that it resulted sexual satisfaction for us both. Our sex life diminished and I found myself masturbating again to the same things I did when I was single.

After she gave birth, our sex life tanked to zero as she struggled caring for the baby and I took over all other household responsibilities. Not having a sex life with her, I decided to simply take care of myself instead of trying to interrupt her when she was obviously exhausted and uninterested. Over the next year she became gradually more interested in sex, but did very little to entice me. At this point sex was not enjoyable. She felt she deserved it simply because she was there and I felt like my role as husband was forgotten. I masturbated on a near daily because I could pretend that the person on the screen was proud to be with me while the person in my home simply saw me as a roommate that paid the bills and had annoying habits.

My wife now wants a divorce citing that my preference for masturbation to pregnant girls is disgusting and I don't have sex with her enough. Despite many times I have requested to go to counseling with her throughout the relationship, she insists that she "isn't the one with the problem" After several sessions with a sex therapist, I have concluded my fascinations are not "wrong" (despite their apparent social taboo nature) but rather a symbolic representation of what I desire most from a partner. Something that if denied by a real person is compensated for by the next best thing: the fantasy. In my opinion, partner sex is WAY better physically than even the best masturbation experience, but after the physical sensation wears off, it's the emotional connection that we lack. Whatever triggered her rejection of my fantasy with no alternative or placeholder seemed to be a rejection of all that I wanted from her as a wife. I feel that if she just understood what that meant to me and that she wasn't an "object" but the physical reality of a person that happened to fill that fantasy with much more, we could work to rebuild our relationship on an adult level with a mature understanding of what each of us wants.

Thank you for reading, I welcome your commentary.

I wish that she'll be able to agree to counseling and realize what she is to you.

Wow, dude. Thanks for sharing.

I've never been married or in a relationship, so I feel like I'm out of my depth giving any sort of commentary or advice. However, I'll do what I can.

It seems to me like your wife was looking to please you early on in the relationship by letting you indulge in your fantasy because she liked you, but later on, as the relationship grew, maybe she expected more from you than just wanting her for your sexual desires. It does sound like she may be a bit needy, but that's just my perception. I do also find it concerning that she's so ready to get a divorce.

If you don't mind, I'd like to ask you a few questions:

1) Do you two love each other?

2) Do you two feel your relationship is worth saving?

3) Would you two be willing to work on repairing/improving your relationship?

Dude... just say your wrong for everything. Women are like idk what. You have to do what they want if your relationship is held hostage. Just apologize, with details and if you must look at something pregnant do it when shes not in the house or in another room she doesnt know about. Trust me. Ive had my gf threaten to dump me an expose my secret. I apolgized and i have a secret location to watch things. Do this an your good.

(April 21, 2016, 9:13 pm)MrTek Dude... just say your wrong for everything. Women are like idk what. You have to do what they want if your relationship is held hostage. Just apologize, with details and if you must look at something pregnant do it when shes not in the house or in another room she doesnt know about. Trust me. Ive had my gf threaten to dump me an expose my secret. I apolgized and i have a secret location to watch things. Do this an your good.

Yeah but it's sad that things are that way, it should be ok to share sexual fantasies with partners. Like keeping secrets shouldn't be required in an ideal situation I feel. I dunno, I guess we don't live in an ideal world.

(April 21, 2016, 9:13 pm)MrTek Dude... just say your wrong for everything. Women are like idk what. You have to do what they want if your relationship is held hostage. Just apologize, with details and if you must look at something pregnant do it when shes not in the house or in another room she doesnt know about. Trust me. Ive had my gf threaten to dump me an expose my secret. I apolgized and i have a secret location to watch things. Do this an your good.

This is the problem with relationships today. It's always about making her feel good, making sure her needs and desires are filled. You know the common adage nowadays, "happy wife, happy life" or "the wife is always right". Just the other day, I was watching house hunters(was bored and nothing else was on) and the female realtor was commenting on how the husband disagreed with his wife on some important issues with the house they were looking at. The realtor said "if he knows what's good for him, he'll let his wife have her way". After hearing that, I was just dumb founded. What happened to 50/50? That men and women are supposed to be equals and that both should respected and cared for in a relationship? And then, when she gets bored or unhappy, she'll leave divorce him, take half his assets and he'll be forced to pay her alimony.

This crap is why I'm not sure about marriage. Sorry about ranting a bit. I know that not every woman is like this and there are some great woman out there but, with the way divorce laws are(at least here in the US), marriage is quickly becoming a risk not worth taking.

(April 21, 2016, 9:13 pm)MrTek Dude... just say your wrong for everything. Women are like idk what. You have to do what they want if your relationship is held hostage. Just apologize, with details and if you must look at something pregnant do it when shes not in the house or in another room she doesnt know about. Trust me. Ive had my gf threaten to dump me an expose my secret. I apolgized and i have a secret location to watch things. Do this an your good.

No offense but this is bad advice. If there's no mutual respect/trust and you keep secrets from each other, it's not a proper relationship and it won't work. Speaking from experience.

Sorry to read your story rogueangel. It sucks but if you can't both agree on counseling to work out the issues that she clearly has as well as your own, then a divorce is probably the best option.

(April 21, 2016, 12:13 pm)belliesrlovely It seems to me like your wife was looking to please you early on in the relationship by letting you indulge in your fantasy because she liked you, but later on, as the relationship grew, maybe she expected more from you than just wanting her for your sexual desires. It does sound like she may be a bit needy, but that's just my perception. I do also find it concerning that she's so ready to get a divorce.

1) Do you two love each other?
Currently: No.
She has a fabricated a image of who she thinks I am (because of our sex life and nothing else) and hates that. She seems to forget everything else.
I hate that she has stopped admiring me for my positive qualities which have only grown over the years. I dislike that she refuses to work towards a better relationship with me or even acknowledging that I am doing what I can for us by myself.

2) Do you two feel your relationship is worth saving?
I do not know. If she recognizes that she played a (substantial) part in the current situation and her childish reactions of not wanting responsibility for the outcome of her life are causing everyone undue misery, she may decide to change her outlook and strategy. I do not nor have I ever denied fulfilling her wants/needs if I could and we decided they were worth while and I enjoyed doing things for/with her with the biggest reward in seeing her happy and knowing I was the cause. All I asked is that she acknowledge that I was that cause.

3) Would you two be willing to work on repairing/improving your relationship?
Certainly, I have offered on many occasions various ways of working together to improve/repairing our relationship. Every single time she insists that "I'm the one with the problem". This speaks volumes to me in the sense that no only does she not care about "us" but she doesn't care about "me" enough to accomidate the challenges I face of a grievance that she brought up.


To those who say "just tell her she's right" I say that is a moral compromise on the highest order. If you honestly believe that you have justification for whatever you are or are not doing and you surrender that to avoid a fight or argument, you are setting yourself up for failure. Women deserve a man who will stand up for their beliefs not to bash hers down, but learn to accomidate each others desires, passions and quirks. I believe this is a man worth respecting and will encourage the same from wife and children and be seen as someone worthy of trust and confidence....a true leader of a family.

Throughout my relationship, I have welcomed my wife's thoughts, hobbies, desires and if I did not understand or agree, I encouraged her to explain why she favored those things. Sometimes she decided it was a silly idea, sometimes I discovered that It was worth her trying alone or even something I might be interested in doing. Either way we both had a better grasp of who we were. This was our early relationship before she suddenly rejected a critical part of my sexual lifestyle.

I believe my biggest mistake was not "owning" my relationship. I very much could have insisted that we go to counseling or a therapist sooner, but felt that her needs (either with pregnancy or with our daughter) out weighed my needs at the time. This is a mistake I will NOT make again. The Husband and Wife form the core of a family and if they fall apart, any relationship with children will suffer collateral damage.

At this point, I do not see much hope for our relationship, but if that is the case, I recognize that I deserve better and that I can take lessons learned here to a future relationship where I can be with a woman recognizes and affirms my positive attributes and is willing to work with/around the negatives. It is possible this COULD be my wife with a change of attitude, but that is not a decision that is mine to make.

(April 24, 2016, 11:51 am)rogueangel007 At this point, I do not see much hope for our relationship, but if that is the case, I recognize that I deserve better and that I can take lessons learned here to a future relationship where I can be with a woman recognizes and affirms my positive attributes and is willing to work with/around the negatives. It is possible this COULD be my wife with a change of attitude, but that is not a decision that is mine to make.

Don't give up hope man, it sounds like you've made steps in the right direction. Counseling very much works as long as you have the right counselor. Hopefully you can convince her to come along to a few sessions and maybe take it from there and rekindle what you had. If worst comes to worst though, from what I quoted above, you sound like you have a deep understanding of what's going on.

Best wishes mate, hope you guys can work it out for your daughters sake.

Update: As of Apr 28, My wife filed for divorce. I have no intention of saving the relationship. Knowing what I know about her know, she is not the same person I thought I married. I found out she has been talking with other guys (past and present) throughout our relationship. Never once did she put effort into solving problems together.

Interestingly I discovered through (voluntary and without my wife) sessions with sex therapist something I would have never known otherwise. My fascination with pregnant women is completely within the realm of normality. The attention towards younger women is simply due to a preference for youthful (biologically healthy) appearance. Given that I am relatively young myself (just turned 30), wanting to have a sexual relationship with a girl that's in her early 20s or looks that way is perfectly reasonable.

For you guys, I can only say this: If you plan to share your sexual interests with your partner, they WILL be used against you in the event of divorce. It really doesn't matter what it is. Just imagine going in front of a court and finishing the sentence "I get off to _______". It doesn't matter what you put in the blank, you will be viewed as a pervert of some kind because society as a whole is not willing to understand that people's sex lives are their own damn business.

All this being said, I still long to (though not right now) have a beautiful and loving wife with whom I can share my life. I plan to have a family with her and make sure that she feels especially loved while carrying my children.