Be warned..this will be a long post

This is probably just another "the wife found out" thread, but never in my life did i expect this day would come and i would be exposed.

So i've almost in my mid 30s now...and the 1st time i felt curiosity towards pregnancy (and childbirth as well) probably when i was 6 or 7. I always felt like i was the weird one as its really a taboo in my country. (somewhere southeast asia)

Needless to say, i was really glad to find this community as internet became a thing while growing up. Sometimes i still feel bad for having this fetish but it is really the 1 and only secret that i would take to my dying grave and i keep reminding myself its not as sick as most people think. Personally i don't just go around trying to hook up and bang pregnant girls. (and even if i did, the girl would probably be heavily pregnant anyway so i dont have to bear any parent kind of responsibility)

Next month is my 1 year marriage anniversary. I dated my wife 2 years before we wed, so all in all we were together for 3 years now. Occasionally we would talk about having kids but the topic never got anywhere as i felt i wasn't ready to become a dad yet (and i felt guilty since i knew i would definitely just view her as a sex object for 9 months) and she was afraid of the pain of childbirth. But yea we've been staying together in our new home since we wed so the "2 person world" experience was good.

Life has been awesome for me lately, mainly because few months back a women's clinic was opened like 20meters away from my workplace. Basically i need to pass the clinic in order to get to the washroom or get to the building exit for lunch breaks. Its actually a struggle for me, both in a good and bad way. Good as in, its basically a preggo heaven. Wearing a suit and tie is my working dress code daily, so seeing pregnant ladies dressed in business attire, tight dress etc is actually very common over here. In fact last week there were 2 preggos, massive torpedo belly, dressed in a tight dress. I wish i could take some candid shots and share with the community, but my work requires me to be professional so i hardly use my phone. Bad as in, holy fuck with all these preggos waddling about you have no idea how hard it is to contain my arousal and excitement.

So me and my wife had an argument a few days back, and i wasnt replying or responding to her messages and calls. She attempted to spike me by sending me photos of her messing around and trying to delete games from my PC. (im also a gamer as well). Then came the 1 photo that i wasn't expecting i would see in this lifetime, a screenshot of my PC "recent places" with a couple of folders and file names that contain "pregnancy". I was always cautious in handling my pregnant stuff. I have hidden internal/external storage disk and only plug them in when i needed, and always double check triple check to make sure my PC was free of all traces. I never expect that she would be able to find anything suspicious. Fortunately she wasnt able to open any folders as I need to actually manually connect my storage disk to open the folders.

She texted "What have you been watching all these while? what is all these weird pregnancy shit? what have you become? this is disgusting". You have no idea how batshit scared i was.

I panicked, and attempted to call her twice, which she refuse to answer. I didnt wanna rush back home as that would only make myself more suspicious of hiding stuff from her so instead i took my time and thought of what to do next.

So i got home, the PC was turned off. She was using IG on her phone as usual. I turned on the PC and went to a porn site and opened a couple of pregnant porn videos, i was ready to tell her everything.

She walked over and i was expecting her to have a huge reaction, in which she didnt, and all she did was close off all the porn videos and saying what is up with me today?

I told her "you said you're disgusted by what you found, now i will show you just how disgusting i am". But she quickly changed the topic and tried to make peace.

I didnt know how to react. Obviously she didnt take it too well and im not sure if she just chose to ignore it.

So we made up and while having dinner she popped the damn question again. "Are you going to explain to me what is all that pregnancy shit doing in your PC?"

I told her i wanted to explain earlier on but she closed off all the porn videos. So again i went to a random porn site, search for some random pregnant shit, and told her sometimes these pregnant thumbnails just appeared randomly on the main porn site. Curiosity got the better of me and i just click to see what it is about, and sometimes it auto saves to my PC. We watched normal porn together sometimes but she knew i do not save them as my PC was always clean. To my surprise she bought my explaination and commented "Oh, i was thinking how come you were watching pregnant porn because thats really sick and gross", and the pregnancy topic pretty much ended there.

Its been a few days since this happened, and im lost. Some part in me still wants to tell her the truth and everything, but im scared she wont take it very well. For those who took the time and effort to read through everything, i greatly appreciate it. What would you guys (and girls) do if you were in my shoes? i really need some opinions and advice here


TL - DR
Wife somewhat discover pregnant shit on my PC.
I was ready to confess my darkest secret, but its obvious she didnt take it too well. (she said it was disgusting).
Manage to convince her what she found was some random pregnant shit that i click out of curiousity on random porn sites.
For now my secret is still safe, but what do you guys suggest? Should i just tell her everything?

Well i'd suggest casually saying "i'm sorry, but i guess i do think about us having kids someday, and actually sometimes I think about you like that"
and since its a fantasy about her,...

Well that's what I'd say. What do you think ladies?

Why didn't you tell her about the fetish before you two tied the knot?

Hmm, this is a tough one. You kind of painted yourself into a corner by not being honest about it. I'm surprised you haven't told her about your fetish at all. Anyway, how does she feel about kinks? Does she have any of her own? If so, that could be one way to broach the topic. And if she gets mad at you for not telling her about it, you can rightfully claim you we're too embarrassed to tell her.

Well he did mention talk of pregnancy were kind of taboo in his part of the world.
It took Demi Moore to bring it out in the open for the US. Can see where he's coming from. Still if she
hasn't clobbered him by now maybe its more of a politeness thing to her.

Somehow i get the impression she's not as repulsed by it as she seems, then again I've been notoriously wrong
before.

(June 19, 2019, 10:27 pm)Mongomaniac Well he did mention talk of pregnancy were kind of taboo in his part of the world.  
It took Demi Moore to bring it out in the open for the US.  Can see where he's coming from.  Still if she
hasn't clobbered him by now maybe its more of a politeness thing to her.  

Somehow i get the impression she's not as repulsed by it as she seems, then again I've been notoriously wrong
before.

Ah, I missed that part.  Now it makes sense why he didn't tell his wife about it.  But, if he and his wife watch porn together maybe she might be open to hearing about the sexual beauty of the pregnant body?

You really should come clean and probably should have before getting married. I have told a couple women in my life and all have thought it was kind of weird but not at all bad.

Why is it considered gross where you're from? Do you need to clarify that it's the woman and not the baby that arouses you? It might be easy to explain away that you like how sometimes the boobs get bigger and the woman gets hornier temporarily, or something like that. It also doesn't involve anyone getting hurt, humiliated, etc. In other words: harmless.

I think you're glossing over what is actually the bigger problem here: she violated your privacy. I about flipped a desk when I read the part about her "messing with you" by getting on your PC and going through your shit. You're OK with that? That's fucked up, man. There's no excuse for that at all. If a partner did that to me, I'd probably end things because it 1) indicates that she does not trust me, and 2) makes it so that I can now no longer trust her.

If you believe you can live with the trust issues and the lie you just told to keep the peace, then I'd leave things as they are because talking about any of it will only make it worse. But if I were you, I'd want to clear the air because you're planning to spend your life with this person and you need to make sure you're not going to be miserable inside. What's been done now can't be undone.

Either you should've came out with it before marring her or kept a tighter lid on your secret.

If you weren't prepared to tell her and wanted it to be a secret forever, then you should've been more careful about where and how you store your porn. A good password on your Windows account could've easily avoided all of this, assuming she's not tech savvy and can crack into it.

(June 20, 2019, 9:50 am)1Way A good password on your Windows account could've easily avoided all of this, assuming she's not tech savvy and can crack into it.

While correct, I feel like people shouldn't have to put passwords on all their shit in their own house to keep spouses out. Just sounds awful.