Disclaimer: this may be the most socially-inhibited betazoid question you've seen in a while, but this is the first time in my adult life I've gotten even remotely close to being able to touch a pregnant woman's belly. And I'm damned if I'm going to blow this opportunity. So I'm asking you, those older and wiser than I, for some advice in this matter.

So here's the score. I've got an old school friend who's recently become pregnant. She's due later this summer, and from photos I've seen she's got a cute little belly which would be just heaven to rub... so I invited her out for a coffee and a catch-up. And, in all honesty, it would be great to catch up with her regardless (haven't seen her for a few years, she kind of dropped off the radar and slummed around Eastern Europe for a while), so my motives aren't all perverse (ah, who am I kiddin').

Anyway, the point is, we were mates once. Hung out, listened to Tool, made shitty videos, talked about Assassin's Creed... so you'd think it'd be cool if we met up, just the two of us, reminisced about Ye Old Days and generally had a good chat?

Wrong. She wants her new-found husband to come along too (it was a shotgun wedding, I'm about 95% sure).

Which means all my smooth-operator plans for "gee, I wonder what it feels like, when the baby kicks..." and "mind if I rub your belly? It's supposed to be lucky, right?" have gone out the window.

So, ladies and gentlemen, my question is thus:

How do I get my once-friend and her unknown-quantity husband to let me touch her belly? How do I slip it into conversation in natural, un-creepy and husband-friendly way?

just go up to her and say "mind if I say hi to the little one?" and start there. if you're affectionate/sensitive about it it'll be hard for her to take it as anything but innocent.

How about not being a total prick and just leaving her alone?

bpuk: yeah, I guess I could segue into it when we're saying goodbye or something.

jamesholt1: thanks for your considered opinion.

Thing is, the main problem is her new hubby, not her. So I guess I could go straight into it as soon as we meet, in a fabulous, joyous, slightly camp way ("oh dahhling, you look simply radiant!", *hold her belly, look at them both*, then: "so how is the little trooper?")...

Also, I shall report back with what worked and what didn't, for the betterment of pregheads everywhere.

Very helpful, james.

I dunno man, the husband being there would throw me all out of whack. I'd be too timid to initiate anything and would wait for her to offer. That really sucks, I was all excited for you until you mentioned baby daddy. :/

I don't see a problem with asking to touch/feel the belly once and only once. Anything more I would steer away from.

I would not ask to touch her being as you have not seen her in a long time. Maybe if you continue to hang out and she grows comfortable with you again you can do so later.

It might be too late to post, but just remain friends with her and don't sexualize it. I had female friends and my bro's ex-GF been pregnant, this is a whole other way to relate with women as a whole. Friends and family members relate to you differently than a girlfriend or wife would. Also I work with the public and knew co-workers been pregnant too, and not gonna sexually harrass or intimidate (the definition if it's unwanted touching or improper relations with the opposite sex). When my bro's ex was pregnant, I felt my nephew (now age 13) move and kick, but this is a whole different context of permitted touching and sharing with the "uncle". Anyway, how did the visit with your friend go...and did she allow you to feel the baby, lifted her shirt or unbuttoned her dress...or shared how she felt during pregnancy??? After all, you're only her best friend even if you're male.

Probably far to late, but try and focus more than you want to on talking to her Husband as he is going to be the key, the fact he's coming highlights they have an open and honest relationship and she has told him about you. He naturally wants to keep an eye on you. Find out about him and get him to like you. If you manage that and the baby starts kicking during your meeting, you might be invited to feel or at least be in a position to ask her husband something like " does it feel strange for you when you feel it kicking away" and see if he or she suggests feeling. You wont get a long perv feel of her belly, it will have to be a normal feel, and it will be if both of them consent. Good luck.