Wow! My buddy had his 30th birthday this past weekend (7/26/14) and we went out to his barn to party. Things where actually pretty tame, and me (and the girl I was with) where getting ready to leave. As we grabbed our booze and sweaters a Ford Explorer pulled up the drive effectively blocking my car in. As soon as the passengers got out, I realized that this party was about to become amazing! The girl getting out from the passenger side, was ready to burst! She begun to sway side-to-side as she slowly waddled up the driveway…
I had to figure out a way to stay, and I turned to my date and said, “I’m parked in; guess we gotta’ stay another hour…” She laughed and went back to the cooler for another Budweiser Lime-a-Rita… Meanwhile, all of the other guy’s girlfriends ran up the drive to meet the gravid blond beauty. I had never seen her before, but it seemed like everyone else was waiting for their long lost BFF. The girlfriends stopped to pose for selfies, with this drop dead beauty, before she could even make it to the barn! Every one of them rubbed her belly, as one girl said, “Jesus, it looks like you have a basketball under there.” Another said, “Omg, you are the cutest preggo ever!”
I played it cool and introduced myself to what turned out to be her husband, and then I immediately pulled my cell phone out and started filming! With the camera rolling I strolled over and casually introduced myself, and found out her name was Mallory.
She was awesome her boobs where magnificent,
and her belly was amazing! It pointed straight out, and actually protruded upward!
I tried to capture it, but I am so tall that the angle made it thought to catch. Her belly was somewhat narrow and accentuated by the fact that Mallory’s hips where so curvy…
Clearly her body had done an excellent job transforming into the fertile princess now standing before me.
I could faintly overhear my buddy and her husband talking. They had to be talking about her… As he said “she still has 7 weeks to go…”
Meanwhile Mallory was constantly switching from resting her arms across her belly,
to placing her hands on the back side of her hips
(for lumbar support). She was clearly uncomfortable from her condition, and she slowly made her way to a camp chair.
I casually made my way over to a seat 2 down from her (as I could glance over, film, and not stare).
Mallory’s girlfriends all stood around her and began gossiping. Every now and then the subject of her current state would come up. She would rub her belly and itch it every now and then… Eventually I tried to ask her, “do you know what you are having,” but she ignored me. Jamie (the girl sitting between us) tried to re-ask my question on my behalf, but to no avail (as Mallory was deep in conversation with her friends).
Jamie was my birthday buddy’s girlfriend/baby momma… She had given birth to their daughter less then 7mos. ago, and unexpectedly began to talk to me about how crazy it was to be pregnant. I instantly perked up, and we started talking. Meanwhile out of the corner of my eye one of the girls huddling around Mallory reached in, and touched her belly. It was obvious that she was trying to feel the baby kick…
I turned to Jamie and said, “That has got to be so crazy.”
Jaime replied, “It is so weird. When I was pregnant, [Payton] never stopped moving… It felt like little flutters at first, but towards the end you could actually see her move. She would roll her elbow or something, and it looked like an alien or something.”
Jamie continued, “Towards the end, I was soooo uncomfortable, because your organs shift inside you. You know..?”
“I can even imagine. That has gotta’ be so cool though.”
“It is!” Jaime replied…
Now was my chance to shift the conversation… “I turned to Jamie and said, “I would love to feel a baby move… I have never touched a pregnant woman’s stomach before [a total lie, but Jamie didn’t know any better]”
“You should!” Jaime replied.
By now Mallory and her friends had gotten up and the group gathered around the keg-o-rater. Jamie and I got up to join the semi-circle.
The guys seemed to be on one side and Jamie, myself, and the rest of the girls were on the other half. Now was my chance!
I re-asked my question; “do you know what you are having?
“Yes… A boy.” Mallory replied.
“Any names picked out?”
“Wyatt.”
“I love it!!! When are you due?”
“September 9th [making her approx. 33wks]”
Just then Mallory shifted from resting her hands on top of her belly to rubbing the side of it.
“Can I feel it?” I said sheepishly.
“Shure!”
I reached over and said, “I have never felt a baby move before [trying to act casual even though I was totally lying].”
“Oh, he’s not moving right now” She said
The moment was awkward, and I quickly pulled my hand away. “I really only wanted to feel him move.” I said to explain my sudden reaction.
Just then a hand reached over and grabbed mine. It was Mallory’s husband… I hadn’t realized he’d left the guys to come over.
He then shoved my hand back on to her belly, and proudly stated; “It’s rock hard! Not what you’d expect.”
Mallory took it from there and guided my hand over her belly. “You see his butt is over here [sliding my hand to just under her left breast], and his back is along here [brushing my hand down the right side].”
“No way” I said, [acting in disbelief].
“Yup” she replied.
Then she pushed my hand from side to side; “those are his arms.” She let go of my hand and pointed to the top right of her belly (just under her boob) and said, “poke it!”
I obliged and then just like that it was all over… I turned to her husband, and changed the subject. The girls went back to their conversation, and I was left with a contact high that would last the rest of the evening.